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What is Your Major Stress in Life?

What is your major stress in life? A few nights back, while queuing in a drive thru, my kids & I were talking about our personalities. We’re making fun of ourselves, and had a good laugh about it. On a serious side, I blurted out that I was a people pleaser. I wanted people to like me, and yes, it has been a major source of stress for me. It has been that way for me. I want to please my parents, siblings, teachers, classmates, bosses, co workers, hubby, kids, etc. I feel disappointment in myself, if I perceive that I don’t come up to their expectations. I feel ashamed of myself, if I deemed that I fail my children, whether imagined or not. These negative feeling does take a toll on my wellbeing. It took years learning this feeling of inadequacy, so it also took years to unlearn it. It is only through God’s mercy and love,  that I am able to accept myself, love myself. It is only through God’s unconditional love, that I am able to say, that  I  AM  ENOUGH.  I am a work in progress,

Why Motherhood Never Ends

God could not be everywhere, and therefore He made mothers. - Rudyard Kipling

Image from Pexels

"Love, next year you'll be 22? Yes, Mommy."

"DJ will turn 20, Ate will be 27 and Cham, this November will be, 25?"

"Uhmmm", was Love's simple reply.

"Looove, Mommy's getting old!"

"You sure are, Mommy!"

That was the gist of the conversation between my youngest daughter and I a few nights ago.

Hmmph, I feel old!

How I remember bringing my kids with me at work. At first, with Darl & Charm, I would bring them with me at work, on Saturdays. I' ll just packed in their bags their favorite toy & book and I can work just fine in the office. They are so well behaved, bringing them with me in the office poses no problem, although at that time, Darl and Charm, were barely, 4 and 2 years old respectively. Then, came Love and DJ, since their Ates (older sisters) were in school already, I would alternately bring them with me in the office.

I love my children very much but the love I give them is tempered with discipline. I do not spoil them by letting them have their way, so early on, in their young lives, they know how to conduct themselves in public. I have not experienced having my child threw a tantrum while in a store because I did not buy them a particular item they like. If they asked me if I can buy a certain toy, book or trinket for them, when I say, this is the money I have, let's buy another or I'll say, we'll buy it next time, they accept that. They may feel a bit sad but they won't cry buckets of tears to have their way.

I remember, secretly following, my two older girls, as they go caroling at Christmas time! They told me, they want to go caroling by themselves but I said I'll go with them but they were adamant not to bring me along. I conceded because I don't want to ruin their fun and I want them to experience, how to go caroling because I didn' t got the chance to do it when I was a kid. So there was I, sneaking behind cars and bushes, while I was following them. They stopped by a house and started singing their Christmas carol songs accompanied by their maracas and tambourine. It was nowhere a perfect rendition of the Christmas carol but it was music to my ears, I was so proud and happy for them. What I failed to do as a kid, my youngsters were fulfilling it for me. The owner of the house went out and gave them some coins, to which this time, they chorused to a "thank you, thank you ang babait ninyo, thank you (thank you, thank you, you're so kind, thank you)! They managed to sing their Christmas carol to several homes more and the two were happily counting the money they received when I was found out!

Mommy! Why are you following us? I embraced my two girls and gave each a big kiss and so they forgot their impatience with me. With each of them holding my hand, we went home, chatting happily.

So this is what being 50 brings about. You feel suddenly old, you wonder how your kids are young adults now. Maybe, I was preoccupied with aging, going through menopause, wanting to reinvent myself, with wrinkles, greying hair, that I somehow safely frozen my kiddos in time. In my mind, they are still my babies, always clinging to Mommy. I would bring them all with me wherever I go. While in the mall, I would have Love and DJ each by my hand, while I let the 2 older girls walk ahead of us, so I can watch over the four of them and keep them safe.

Now, is a different story. My Darl and Charm are both working now. They have their schedules, even though we're staying in the same house, sometimes we don't see each other. When they're home, I'm at work or if I'm the one at home, the two are working. DJ, would be out with his friends, either to play basketball, Dota or with his classmates finishing a project or other school works. Love, on the other hand, is the one I'm with constantly but sometimes, she too has to go on an overnight with her classmates for their thesis. When I bade Charm, goodbye, as she drives off on Sunday evenings, I feel sad, I feel a bit lost, although I know, she'll be home the following week.

It's hard to be a Mommy. It's hard to let your children go. But such is the fate of all parents, you take care and rear your children and in their adult life, you have to accept they also have their own lives to live. Love is selfless, especially if you're a Mom or a Dad. Being a parent is timeless, there is no break, time out or retirement. There is no salary, bonus or retirement pay. To be a parent is to give your unconditional love to your children. Most of the time, it is heartbreaking to love your child because you know one day, you'll no longer be the number 1 person in their life.

If you love somebody, set them free. If they come back, they're yours; if they don't, they never were. - Richard Bach

To love and raise our children well are our ultimate goals as a parent. To see them living their dreams is our happiness.

I say a heartfelt prayer for each of my children. For the Lord to bless and guide them in all their endeavors. Mommy will always be here, with my arms open to embrace each of my children. And that is why Motherhood never ends.

My family
Did you felt a bit lost and lonely too as your children became adults? Care to share it? Just comment below.

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Middle life is beautiful.

Till next time. God bless.


  1. First, what beautiful children; I love these family photos!! My two are 22 and almost 19 - it really is hard thinking about how fast they grew up. I feel like being a mother is the best gift ever and you are certainly right, it's a lifelong job and a lifelong blessing!

    1. Hi Lisa! Thanks for complimenting my children! I see you have budding adults too in your nest. I appreciate it that as a mother, we are on the same wavelength that you too considers motherhood as a lifelong blessing. <3

  2. This is such a beautiful, heart felt post!
    Thanks so much for sharing your wonderful family with us.

    Now, for the good news, they do come back.
    And, it’s also in a beautiful way. They bring more love and people with them. Your family grows and blooms.

    Take it from me, you get to start over with precious, sweet grandchildren.

    And believe me, they will steal your heart away!

    Rosemary xoxord

    1. Hi Rosemary! You’re right, children will come back and along with them, additions to the family.

      Thanks, Rosemary! I highly appreciate it that you liked my blog post. 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩

  3. It is hard to let your kids go but it is also beautiful to see them becoming adults and building up their lives. My daughters are 26 and 20 and I am their biggest admirer. My oldest is living and working in Melbourne and the youngest chose to study law in the Netherlands. It is not easy to have them that far but I was an adventurous person and so are they. I am proud.

  4. Hi Marijke! I like it that you have shared a bit about your own daughters. That’s what mothers are for, we are the number 1 fans of our children. We are proud of all their achievements, big or small and we are the first to be there, to listen with open ears and arms to comfort them. 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩


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